I have some sad news
Yesterday morning, I stopped down at my house (I stayed at my mom's) before work, and I could not find the Ducks. Thinking to myself that they had to be somewhere, I went on with my news. But sadly, when I got home that evening, they were no where to be found. The general conclusion is that they were stolen, or something unspeakable happened to them. There is a little pile of suspicious feathers, but they have been dropping feathers for some time. It’s a mystery, and it’s sad.
Good bye Franklin and Maxwell
Good bye Franklin and Maxwell
posted by Spinfly at 10:57 AM
40 Comments:
They were fine ducks alright. I know the feeling, Spin.
Coons got my pet chicken once, remember. Seems to be a lot of theft going on at your house. Maybe it's time some asses started getting kicked. (Pisses me off.)
I like to think that Franf and Max are on and adventure, and that someday, they will return brighter and more rounded.
Good way to think, Spin.
I don't know about brighter though.
They were pretty white already.
Maybe if they were glowing.
...like duck bodhisattvas.
...or webfooted Christian martyrs.
Oh, those Patos.
I will force myself to believe that the ducks are on an adventure, because if I find out they were stolen, I might go postal.
I liked those ducks...strike that...I love those ducks.
Skog. Let's make a pact. You and I will fight on the same side to right injustices (like theft of dux from
yard of Spin). But other than that, all bets are off.
(...it would be nice to see those arrows pointed some
other way than towards me once in a while!)
As soon as you're off the list of suspects, we will unite forces to save the dux.
Ahhhhh! I hate that Skog
Hmmm...me thinks the Owl is a wee bit defensive.
(puts on Sherlock Holmes hat and places pipe in her mouth)
So tell me...Owl...did you kill/hide/maim/transport/ship and or kidnap the ducks?
Did you want to be the only bird in Spinfly's heart?
You're no fowl, sir...you're just foul.
I refuse to answer on the grounds
that doing so may tend to intimidate me.
Hey Skog, depose this.
(labels Owl as Suspect Numero Uno)
Go get her, Skleeve.
Who am I? WHO AM I?
Shit...who am I?
Would somebody who knows Skleeve tell him who I am via e-mail or what not?
I'd tell him on here...but then the minions and fans would start to congregate and BOOM...the blog would crash.
I don't want that on my shoulders.
The Skleeve cuts to the chase, and Skog to the quick. Skleeve's my hitman Skog, and he knows Bernie the Attorney. Now, believe me when I say
you don't wanna mess with either of those boyz.
Actually, Skleeve, Skog is the person who used to be Sarah. Remember her? She was nice. Still is. A good friend of Bon's. "Skoggle" is her alter-ego. I think Sarah uses Skog to practice the nastiness she sometimes has to employ in her chosen profession. (She's a lawyer.) I'm actually a fan of hers (but don't ever tell her, ok? She might throw up a little bit in her mouth.)
(throws up a little bit in her mouth)
Any report on the status of the dux?
Also, after some investigating, I have removed the Owl off the list of potential suspects, but I have added Eekerz and Giant...who were noticably absent the other night.
Why? Because they couldn't face us because they KNEW what was about to unfold.
(hits play on boom box)
(silence)
(kicks boom box)
(dramatic music plays for three seconds, followed by the sound of a tape tangling)
Shit.
No Clues. Love that last post. Add to my list...
Animal control, the homeless guy who lives in the cul-de-sac below our house, the devil (who else would steal ducks. That’s all I know. Sad, sad, sad.
...never should have been on the @#%*^!% list in the first place. Time wastin,' carpetbaggin', twelve sandwich eatin', deposition givin,' pea-brained, tongue waggin' numb nuts....(mumble, mumble...)
Weren't they Chad's dux?
They were Chad's Ducks... but that doesn't mean that I didn't get attached to them.
I know that, Spin. I'm just wondering
if Chad knows where they went?
(In my day, nobody ever told us little kids,
while we were polishing off the pork chops,
that we were eatin' "Arnold" from Green Acres.)
the funny thing about it was that no one was there that night. Chad stayed at his moms house, and Amy and Todd were at a friends. So, maybe it was Chad. But he seemed to be pretty upset when i told him the news as well.
WHO THE HELL STEALS DUCKS?
Foxes.
"Well the fox he came to a mighty penn,
the dux and the geese were kept therein,
he said "One a you critters gonna grease my chin,
before I leave this town-o"
Then he grabbed the grey goose by the neck,
and threw a duck across his back,
he did not mind the "quack, quack quack"
or the legs all danglin down-o.
Then ol' momma Spinfly jumped outa bed
and threw the covers off her head cryin'
Oh f**k who took the d***ks?
and the fox is on the town-o
town-o
town-o
Oh f**k who took the d***ks?
Now the fox is on the town-o
Twelve sandwich eatin'?
(GASPS)
Well Skog, you know what Flick the Fly always says:
"Why is it always about a sandwich?"
(Hey, what was that one sandwich joke he said that about anyway, Spin?)
ahem "samich" thank you very much
Samich joke
No, it's not the "sammich" joke, it was the one just before that... the one that Jake asked about. I don't think the joke was actually about a sandwich, there was just a sandwich in it.
Is this the most comments posted for an entry thus far on this wee blog?
It's a testament to our love of the dux.
Moving on...just read the posts about the sammich. The dog joke is highly offensive. I plan on telling it to at least 4 people once I'm off work.
oh fuck the ducks are gone!! better get matlock on the case.
Two hillbillies walk into a bar. While having a shot of whiskey, they
talk about their moonshine operation. Suddenly, a woman at a nearby
table, who is eating a sandwich, begins to cough. After a minute or
so, it becomes apparent that she is in real distress.
One of the hillbillies looks at her and says "Kin ya swallar?"
The woman shakes her head no.
"Kin ya breathe?"
The woman begins to turn blue and shakes her head "no".
The hillbilly walks over to the woman, lifts up the back of her dress,
yanks down her drawers and quickly gives her right butt cheek a lick
with his tongue. The woman is so shocked that she has a violent spasm
and the obstruction flies out of her mouth. As she begins to breathe
again, the hillbilly walks slowly back to the bar.
His partner says,"Ya know, I'd heerd of that there 'Hind Lick
Maneuver', but I ain't niver seen nobody do it!"
Fri Apr 15, 09:17:04 AM MDT
That's the joke, Spinfly!
Why is it always a sandwich!
Thanks, Sweets.
Now let's find them ducks.
(And maybe jerk wildcat9two's
chain while we're at it)
Thats a chain I might have to stay away from!
But no worse than the chain Skog is about to create with the "little dog" joke, Spin, right?
Note to Skog: What happens in the spave, stays in the spave...got it bee-otch?
Ahem...
I can do what I want.
And you have already contradicted your comment about keeping things in the spave.
My proof? The inappropriate gesture you passed on to me on Monday night after you dropped alter_Nate off at Ethunk's house.
Clearly it referred to our blogging war...which I am winning.
You're right, Skog, I gave you a salute.
Here's another one. (same as that one)
I was just making a lame attempt to parody the Las Vegas commercials.
We took a vote a long time ago when Toad first showed up as to whether we wanted this to be an open blog.
The vote was yes.
We were brave.
If you want to tell the "little dog" story, go ahead.
(But blame it on the Skleeve, will ya! Sure, I told it to him, but I didn't think he'd post it on the blog!)
Sheesh ...kids these days...I must be gettin' old.
(giggles)
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